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Fear
Aug 5, 2003 22:50:04 GMT
Post by marney on Aug 5, 2003 22:50:04 GMT
Hey I know this may seem a bit in depth, but I'm trying to write a book (very, very slowly) and as one of the themes is fear, I'd like to have some feed back What is fear? What do you fear? How do we overcome fears? And anything else u may think of...
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Fear
Aug 6, 2003 0:15:22 GMT
Post by stokerino on Aug 6, 2003 0:15:22 GMT
I know this may seem like a longwinded and to most people thoroughly boring/confusing answer, but it's only fair that I give Marney what help I can...even if I haven't got a clue what I'm talking about and I'm figuring it out (aka 'making it up') as I go along...
On the subject of "how do we overcome fears", I note that the usual piece of advice is that we should confront them head on. This is, of course, based upon the perhaps optimistic assumption that they are always irrational fears. It is not advisable if, for example, you fear touching live 10,000V wires. Let's face it - there are often good reasons for these things. Irrational ones come about when we think that there are good reasons in our head. As the great Michael Hayes (you don't know who he is) once said, albeit concerning an entirely different context: "no matter how wrong the logic behind it may be, they still feel justified" - which I think applies. I find that there are two types of fears: 1) Firstly there are the easily distinguishable and often rather cheesy ones. e.g. fear of spiders, fear of the dark, fear of being stared at (I kid ye not - ophthalmophobia, it is apparently called - according to my amazing Little Red Miscellany of Everything). These types of fears are recognised, announced, and accepted by yourself and others (albeit often with a chuckle). You can go out and find other people who share these fears, which seems to provide some form of comfort. Unless action is taken against these fears, they tend to stay with you through life as a kind of quiet stable background thing - not getting any better or worse. I, personally, have a sort of semi-vertigo. I'm not afraid of heights as such - I just don't like it when I'm close to the edge and there's nothing between me and it...I think that's reasonable (Then again, I would). 2) The other type of fear are the more complex ones. In some ways they are more like habits than actual phobias. They usually develop out of paranoia, or fear of the unknown. These tend to be far, far stronger than the 'phobias' (because they are more personal, and unique to your own circumstances) and yet at the same time far more inexplicable and/or unjustifiable. For example, being afraid of talking to someone again after some long-past incident, or being afraid of turning on your mobile phone because of what txt messages you may receive (cough). Things like this tend to either be solved relatively quickly - by addressing the source of the problem - or they can just stagnate and continue to the point when the original cause of the fear either no longer matters or is forgotten completely - it simply becomes habit. At this point, all requirements for 'justification' of the fear are negated and it consumes a part of you. You cannot remember if there even was a past incident that was so bad, or what was quite so terrible about those txt messages you used to receive - but you still continue being afraid of it anyway...just because. You may note that I'm not telling you any of MY fears of this kind...they are/were far too personal to be randomly thrown on to a message board such as this...even if I am the current Administrator Anyway, that was a very simplistic division of fears and probably entirely inaccurate - BUT, for someone who's just blabbering about things that he doesn't really understand himself...I think I'm doing reasonably well I would most likely, if given a few hours, a supply of orange juice for sustenance, and had anything better to do taken away from me, be able to write down a load load of crap about this sort of thing as it occured to me...which could then be filtered out to leave the couple of paragraphs which contained things that made sense...but this message board is not the place for that, and I shall stop here.
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Fear
Aug 7, 2003 20:28:56 GMT
Post by Pheebs on Aug 7, 2003 20:28:56 GMT
Tim, that has to be the longest post I have ever seen...
Fear... hmm, well... there are different types I think... silly fears like spiders (ewww... they are so gross.) and big fears like, I don't know, losing your mind so you don't know whats real anymore, and then you can't understand anything. I think thats kinda scary for me
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Fear
Aug 9, 2003 18:21:09 GMT
Post by stuart alman on Aug 9, 2003 18:21:09 GMT
hmm speaking of vertigo wot do u call it wen u can stand very high up and look over the edge but u cant stand in the middle of a building of the same height and look up. Now thats reallt scary lookin up wen ure on somethin very tall!
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Fear
Aug 10, 2003 22:57:03 GMT
Post by Ooglepip on Aug 10, 2003 22:57:03 GMT
fear is knowing that if i pass my fucking a levels I can kiss all that i love and want to stay here for goodbye. you know what i'm saying marney.
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Fear
Aug 16, 2003 13:27:35 GMT
Post by FaeryTor on Aug 16, 2003 13:27:35 GMT
Ok, perhaps that (cough) fear may have been slightly unusual, but i know others who have suffered from it too! Also it's not just the texts, it's also the voice mails- "You are the one, all the love".... & one i received, after turning my phone off this morning at about 2, in a strange anonymous voice offering me "a bottle of babysham." (-finally worked out it was the 23yr old) So [shadow=black,left,300]fear[/shadow]- i've been in the proper intense state of fear a few times - where you really don't think you can move & you expect not to get out of the situation. Your limbs feel like they've seized up & you kinda want to get away, but then also get what it is over and done with- even if that is getting murdered. In Knowledge of Angels Palinor emptied his bowels which is reaction to extreme fear sometimes (gross though). Hmm, increased heart rate, and heavy breathing, etc. You get over it in different ways- depending on what it is and sometimes you may never get over it. T
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Fear
Aug 21, 2003 0:36:10 GMT
Post by kingdan on Aug 21, 2003 0:36:10 GMT
there are people who fear for the unknown, people who are intrigued by it. this could be whats under the bed, whats in outer space.... There are general day to day fears that can be mostly trivial- an example is "what will she say if i ask her out?" , or "will i pass my exams?". many of them are questions to ourselves and the outcome can only be found out in time, or after or during the event.
Other fears are for our well being, and others. Anything- person, matter/ objects, that we believe can harm us can be frightening. For exam if something looks sinister, or evil, we may well be frightened. an example is some horror films with the use of werewolfs, vampires and monsters etc etc. Others could be fears of people with objects that could harm us-knives, guns (however this fear only generally occurs when in a situation involving these "weapons "). And again fears of animals. Some animals are strong, fast, hunters. these could harm us if they wanted and fears usually come about when they are misunderstood or there is not a great knowledge of them. An example is sharks and spiders-this fear is not helped by films like "jaws" and "arachnaphobia". people can fear great heights, which is common.
In my opinion it comes back to anything that can harm us, and so most , if not all fears are brought about by the fear of death.
However there are exceptions. it is known that people can have great fears of sponge and oranges and things of this like. this can seem strange to most people and funny but it happens.
SO... in essence fears can be of things that cause embarressment, or have negative consequences or that could ultimately lead to death. -Alternatively they can be from bad experiences, or can be seemingly unexplainable. Thus it is a very complex word in entirety and is thus very hard to explain without being very general or wrong in some way.
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Fear
Sept 13, 2003 21:07:32 GMT
Post by PatDaBrat on Sept 13, 2003 21:07:32 GMT
Fear is getting stuck in a lift with marney haha! (only jokin..or am i?) Fear is also germs. I hate germs. Fear is mobile phones (i too have suffered from UTS (unwanted text syndrome)) Fear is also getting ur head stuck in places such as railings That will be all...
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doff
Mercenary
Posts: 14
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Fear
Sept 14, 2003 18:50:12 GMT
Post by doff on Sept 14, 2003 18:50:12 GMT
i fear going online cause stuart makes me post on this fookin bored
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Fear
Sept 14, 2003 19:32:11 GMT
Post by stuart alman on Sept 14, 2003 19:32:11 GMT
hehe that pesky lil doff always causin trouble
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Fear
Sept 15, 2003 22:07:45 GMT
Post by TigerArmyNeverDie on Sept 15, 2003 22:07:45 GMT
I have a fear of marneys book being published. Oh and moths and umbrellas. Seriously, I'm not just being a bastard
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